Oh, so much better than Friday, Autumn!  As far as furry hats go, I quite like this one.  She really looks like she fits in with the Windsor women wearing this particular topper, doesn’t she?

Autumn, you look like you just came from filming a music video with the Black Eyed Peas.  What in the world has happened to my favorite little Canadian Maple Leaf??

An early Christmas treat: it’s Zara Phillips, out at a wedding in Canterbury, wearing a lovely fascinator!  I quite like this one, with its silvery color and the interesting shape and embellishments.  But if it looks a little familiar, it’s because it has been seen on one of the Windsor women before:

Here’s Autumn Kelly joining the royals for Easter at Windsor just before her 2008 wedding to Zara’s brother, Peter, wearing the same fascinator.  I suppose that the sisters-in-law who hat around together stay together?

My favorite newlyweds are back from Hong Kong!

I’m serious … someone should corral them and give them a baronetcy or something tout de suite. They are adorable. I want to see them out on the royal stump. Even workhorse Princess Anne deserves someone to pick up the slack occasionally.

And Autumn, at her first family Christmas at Sandringham, is fitting in with the royal hat trend of the day: the beret. I like this one in principle, and I think she looks really cute, but I fear that our little Canadian Maple Leaf suffers from the same quandary that I do when sporting a similar hat style: what in the world are you supposed to do with your ears? Mine can look quite prominent when wearing certain hats, and this, I hate to say, is sort of doing the same for Autumn.

I think I would adore it if it were more structural and didn’t fit down over her head the way this one does, if that makes any sense at all.

Behold: a true triumph of hattery has taken place in Gloucestershire. How often does a member of the royal family wear not one but two casual hats in a single day?

Exhibit A:
This one’s pure classic Autumn. She’s been photographed in this very hat before – she seems quite fond of the cowboy look for casual events. The sunglasses on top of the hat move is also a signature one. I’m sure some would disagree, but I think this is a lovely casual wear kind of look, with the hat, some simple jewelry, and an event polo shirt. (And it makes me thirsty.)

But! Exhibit B:
Hat number two! And a happy baby! I’m serious — these two need to be given titles, stat. They’re just too appealing. She can be the Commonwealth’s new favorite lady/countess/duchess/whatever, and her mother-in-law can teach her how to rock her charity duties (but not how to dress/style her hair/wear a hat).

(Also, in the interest of full disclosure, I’m pretty sure the photo agency has the date wrong on these. Both are labeled August 2, but she’s wearing a gold bracelet on her right arm in the first photo and not in the second. But just in case she changed and true hat greatness has taken place, I felt it was important to let our favorite Canadian have her day in the sun…)

Oh, no! Not our favorite Canadian!

It’s like perhaps Princess Anne and her new daughter-in-law made a pact to look terrible together at today’s royal nuptials. Maybe they wanted to make sure that Lady Rose looked extra gorgeous?

The neck scarf makes her look like a flight attendant. The dress looks a size too small — not flattering on a petite little maple leaf like Autumn. And the hat … well, I think a similar effect could have been achieved had she sent Peter out to gather up bird feathers from the park and superglued them to the back of her head. I’m just so disappointed. From the glowy, blushy pink hat to this?

So, we must have been very good little girls this year, because Father Christmas brought us Beatrice, Eugenie, and Autumn for Ladies’ Day!

And … they don’t look terrible! Not a blessed one of them! (And here’s a secret — don’t tell anyone — we don’t hate any of their hats!) More on Bea and Eug later; we’re picking on the new girl in this post. Autumn’s so giggly and happy and bubbly — we adore this new Canadian shot of adrenaline in the arm of the Firm!

I think the reason that this actually works so well is the color — the pink is fabulous. When the sun shines down on her, the whole thing casts a nice rosy glow on her face. It’s lovely, and exactly the opposite effect of Camilla’s big aqua hat — that one gave more of a “seasick” hue than a blushing pink.

(Sidenote: Also, the Queen’s favorite grandson looks smashing. [Don't deny it, we're pretty sure it's absolutely true. He doesn't stumble around drunk and has a job and acts like an adult and married a pretty little Canadian lady.] If only someone would forcibly knight him or something so we could have more pictures of these two kissing sick babies at hospitals and pulling back those stupid little curtains from plaques!)

See, she’s all glowing and blushy! So, even though the hat is gigantic in size, we love it. It’s perfectly extravagant without being silly-looking.

We are, of course, saving the best for last. Let’s start small, with the hat that our favorite Canadian maple-leaf, Autumn Kelly Phillips, is wearing on the left. (Also, we believe this is the new Mrs. Phillips’s first balcony appearance. Congrats, Autumn!)

You know, look past the thing you’re actually looking at and try to see the relatively benign hat choice of the newest member of the royal family. It’s impossible to see if she’s got feathers or pinwheels or whirligigs hanging off the band of her hat, but we’re guessing not.

Here’s a better view: yeah, none of the above on Autumn’s brim, just a two-toned curly ribbony thing. Her saucer-style brim, though, puts Autumn in company with her new Aunt Sophie. She’d better watch out if the planes flying over head kick up the breeze. But, now, to that other thing you’re looking at.

Good work, Wills — we know it’s tempting to glance over at your step-mum, but we’re afraid that staring straight at it would have eclipse-like effects. Yes. So, let’s tally this up, shall we? Feathers? Check. Flowers? Check. Lack of actual hat? Apparently, check. Camilla’s landed herself firmly in fascinator territory with this style statement: we’re not entirely sure that this isn’t growing right out of the back of her head.

Also, look at how squinty she is compared to the rest of the hatted-out royal ladies — surely something with some sunshade would have made this whole thing a little easier for the Duchess. Even though we’re mildly terrified by this “hat,” we have to applaud Her Royal Highness — with no Eugenie, no Bea, and no Zara, we’re really glad someone pulled it out and wore something this crazy.

And now, for the star of the show: the beautiful, blushing bride!

Also, Tiara Alert!

Autumn’s not only got a lovely, lacy wedding dress and a handsome new husband, she’s also got a loaned tiara from her new mother-in-law, Princess Anne:

This is the Festoon Diamond Tiara, gifted to Princess Anne by the World Wide Shipping Group in 1973, the year she married Peter Phillips’s father, Captain Mark Phillips. You can find pictures of Anne wearing the Festoon tiara here at the Royal Forums. The Festoon isn’t the tiara that Anne wore on her own wedding day, however; that was Queen Mary’s Fringe Tiara, also worn by then-Princess Elizabeth when she married Prince Philip in 1947. It is owned by the crown, and was loaned to Anne for her wedding.

If there’s one lady in the Phillips branch of the Windsor family who knows how to rock casual wear, it’s Autumn Kelly (soon to be Mrs. Peter Phillips). The royal fiancée always looks smart in this hat (a favorite for outdoor events like the horse trials). Her future mother-in-law chose a more predictable chapeau for such an event, a baseball cap, but Autumn’s hat is more individual, more youthful, and much more stylish. Good job, Autumn! You’re going to fit in just fine with the royal crew.